![]() But overall it was an okay experience, and not something I'd do on a regular basis. He enjoyed it quite a bit, and there were moments where I liked it too - except for when he tried going deeper. In about 15 minutes he was completely in and stroking me, but he kept trying to force his 6 incher all the way in, which was probably the painful part of the experience. And as you can imagine, I was really tight, so he had to put in a little effort to getting it in. Being my first time, I do have to admit that it was a little painful, but I let him know when he needed to slow down his intensity. He grabbed the lube, fingered me a few times while I positioned myself doggy style at the foot of his bed on top of an ottoman, and tried relaxing. Both of us are tops, and he was a bit shocked that I wanted to, but he was game anyway. It was a bit intense, as we got into it, but after 15 minutes of no one getting off, I decided to give bottoming a try. Well, I went over to his place, showered while he did the same, then we jumped on the bed and began 69ing each other. This time I decided to give it a try, since I hear so many people talk about how they enjoyed it, and what a rush it is. This is actually our second encounter, but the first time I topped him. He's local, and his cock is a few inches smaller than mine. Met a cool guy on Craigslist a few weeks back. Not getting fucked doesn’t make you any less gay.Well, I finally did it. Similarly, if you’re a bottom-only queen, ask yourself why. If you believe that topping is preferable because it doesn’t threaten your masculinity, then have a strong word with yourself. Not only are you saying that it's more masculine to be a top, but you're saying that you should be ashamed to be a bottom.”īasically, it could be time to seriously check yourself and ask exactly why you don’t like bottoming (or topping, TBH). “You don't ever hear tops being called sluts, just bottoms. ![]() “If you're a bottom, you’re sometimes seen as a slut,” he says. Chris White, an expert in health promotion and the director and principal investigator of the Safe and Supportive Schools Project at the Gay-Straight Alliance Network in San Francisco, takes this one step further. “With bottoming there is the perception that you're giving up your masculinity because receiving a penis is something that women do,” Miller adds.ĭr. The ongoing fetishization of masculinity means that the traditionally submissive role of the bottom is associated with effeminacy. “What I mean by that,” he says, “is that cultural forces within the gay community prize topping over bottoming.” ![]() It could open up a world of possibilities.Īs Miller explains, there are outside forces that, dating back to the ancient Greeks, have prevented gay men from truly digging into what sexual behaviors we might actually enjoy. So, with the help of some experts, let’s take a moment to dismantle what you think you know about topping and bottoming. ![]() Sure, people have a preference, but now could be the perfect time to escape the top or bottom prison you live in. But it ought not to be impossible to sexually switch things up. These two subdivisions have their own rules, stereotypes, and in-jokes, and can sometimes seem as if they’re at war with each other, rather than both working together for mutual sexual pleasure.Īll of this can make trying different things daunting, especially if you’re a baby gay venturing into this world for the first time. But often, penetrative sex can feel divided into rigid binaries that make being a top or a bottom seem like a cult you’ve signed up to for life, and one that you have to declare as soon as two (or more) consenting men decide to take their clothes off and rub up against each other. This is clearly not the case, especially for those people who consider themselves versatile ( HIYA). Legend would have you believe that once you’ve earned your gay card, a Harry Potter–like ceremony occurs where, instead of the Sorting Hat, a giant magical butt plug divides all gay men into two houses: tops or bottoms. ![]()
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